Essay on Gender Based Violence

Submitted By mommy7232
Words: 1659
Pages: 7

Gendered Based Violence

In this paper we will discuss three different types of gender-based violence. We will discuss intimate partner abuse, harassment, and sexual abuse. These types of abuse happen all over the world, every day. These types of abuse are usually gender based and geared toward women. Let us begin with intimate partner abuse. In the U.S. domestic abuse accounts for 11% of all murders and three out of four victims are women. (Sapiro) The rate of intimate partner violence is higher among some categories of women than others. This is especially higher for women in their early 20’s, poorer women, black women, divorced or separated women, and or women with children in the household. (Sapiro) Victims of domestic violence are not just subject to physical abuse, they may also experience one or more of the following: somatic and stress related illnesses, chronic pain syndromes, depression, post traumatic stress disorder(PST), or even substance abuse disorders. (Sapiro) There has been much debate as to the cause of domestic abuse against women. Some, especially the men committing the abusive acts, would say that it is actually the woman’s fault. She caused her own abuse. How crazy does that sound? But, unfortunately the men really believe that’s the reason they do what they do. They will say that they were provoked and she deserved it. I know this to be true by personal experience. I was married to my husband for ten years and we had six children at home. He was an abusive man and in the beginning it was all good. But soon after we married he became very controlling and he was verbally and emotionally abusive. He isolated me from my family and friends. He only wanted me to be at home and under his control/. He was a very jealous man and we would fight if another man even spoke to me. I had to do something or say something to make that other man even pay attention to me. It was always my fault. He would degrade me and I allowed him to destroy my self-esteem. He was very big on traditional roles for men and women. He was the breadwinner and I was the homemaker. He made sure the bills got paid and I made sure the children were taken care of and catered to his needs as well. I found myself always trying to please him so that he didn’t get upset and go off. It was just the verbal and emotional abuse at first and then came the physical. I think that he started with the physical abuse because he never had consequence for the other behaviors, so he might as well get that off too. I was afraid to leave him because I had been so dependent on him throughout the years, that I honestly didn’t think I would make it without him. He liked things this way and he liked the fact that I was so dependent on him. He felt like he was more in control of the situation. Not to mention the fact I had six children depending on us both. I had never went to the law before and the one time I did he was able to lie and say that I was the aggressor and they made me leave my house with the kids. He was able to stay and they told me that if I came back before 24 hrs was up I would be the one to get arrested. I never called the police again. I thought to myself, they would not believe me anyway and was no help the last time I called. Up until the 70’s the law enforcement really wouldn’t do anything for a domestic call. They would consider themselves to be the peace makers and that’s it. No arrest was ever really made. I watched a true story on Lifetime called “The Tracy Thurman Story”. It was a woman who was married to an abusive man and she tried several times to get away from him. He abused her every time he seen her. She had a restraining order against him and he was still stalking her and harassing her. She had called the police every time she seen him outside her house or if he showed up at her door. She had called the police so many times that they thought she was just…